As I write this, it’s after midnight and I can’t figure out why I’m even thinking about food. I had a little snack at 11:30 and drank a glass of fruit juice. So why should I want to eat anything else? Well, the problem is that I’m going for a blood test in the morning and it’s one of the “fasting” kinds (can’t figure out that word…Usually, the time just drags when I’m not eating. It’s not fast at all…). So no food until after they stick the needle in my arm sometime after 7:00 AM. I always think that a Honey Bun would be smart before that, just to keep me from getting queasy while watching…
What I want to know is, what is it about being told not to do something that makes me want to do it desperately? Most nights, I can go from that little snack before midnight until 11:30 or later the next morning without craving a bite. But tonight, I just really need a little something right now!
I’m gonna blame this one on Eve…I know, not very gallant (nor even doctrinally sound), but she’s the bad example I point to when I need to rationalize my shortcomings in the area of forbidden food. God: “Of all the trees in the Garden, you may eat, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, you may not eat.” Eve: “Adam, I want that fruit. Pick me one, will you please? Pretty Please?” So I’m in good company, when I say, “I’m hungry!”
The blood test? Oh, just my semi-annual sacrifice of blood so that my doctor, who I love, can have an excuse to castigate (I know, that even sounds medical, doesn’t it) me for my lack of exercise and self-control in dietary intake. Well actually, I like what my oh-so-fit, run-til-it-hurts, don’t-be-a-crybaby sister-in-law said to me once. “Paul, you don’t need to eat less (that’s the part I like!), you just need to exercise more (not so much that part…). But the good doc, to his credit, keeps believing me when I say, “I’ll do better this time, I promise! Yes, I understand what I need to do. No, I do not need to take those pills!”
And now the Day-of-Reckoning has once more arrived and I’ve not walked, biked, or jogged more than three times in the last two months. The trips to La Juerta (I love the guacamole) and La Capilla (ditto), to say nothing of Fratelli’s (Chicken Florentine is to die for, of course, not literally), have been pretty frequent lately too, so the conclusion is the ever present foregone one; The cholesterol will be high, the triglycerides even higher. However, I’m pretty sure that the sodium levels will be within the acceptable limits. Do you suppose that will placate him? Will he even compliment me about my self control in not adding salt to my food? Nooo!…He’ll just have to focus on that cholesterol number being higher than the number of candles on Uncle Sam’s birthday cake last July 4th. And after he’s scolded me for awhile, I’ll tell him that I’ll do better next time and I understand what I need to do. Oh! And I don’t need those pills! Did I tell you that I love my doctor?
So, like the night before any big exam, I’m not sleeping, but I’m not cramming either (food, that is). At this point, a walk through town seems unproductive (it’s raining anyway), so here I sit, craving food that I can’t have. Anybody have a Twinkie?
Why am I hungry again?