Five late-night sessions at the keyboard. I should clarify. Five fruitless, frustrating, you might even say futile, attempts to kick start my nightly habit of sharing a little piece of my life and heart with those of you who choose to muddle through these sometimes light-hearted and frequently pedantic posts. I have been trying to blame my recent failure on a bicycle misadventure which I managed to get myself into just over a week ago, but tonight, I’m thinking that may just be a convenient scapegoat. Time will tell.
As I sat once more tonight and considered a subject appropriate for writing (and reading) about, I glanced over a couple of recent, unfinished posts and came across one with the title you see above this column. Opening the field which should have yielded a clue to the actual subject for the aborted discourse, I found…absolutely nothing. I still had nothing at all in the way of explanation of my original intent for the orphaned title. My mind, like the blank field I found myself faced with, was empty. Upon further examination of events of the last week however, I’m coming to believe that I may actually be a prophet.
The answer to the question above, of course, is “Yours Truly”. After all, what seemed a spectacularly brilliant idea, night riding to avoid the intense daytime heat, returned a spectacularly dismal result. Because of the nature of the accident, I have no memory of what actually occurred. Regardless of the details, which may never be known, it was not a successful implementation of a new regimen for staying fit. Perhaps it was a case of poor research, resulting in a faulty conclusion. It may have even been a great plan, but just poor implementation. Either way, I will tell you the same thing the Lovely Lady reports that I blurted out to her, just before we headed for the Emergency Room: “Well, that wasn’t such a good idea…”
A lifetime it seems, of Steve Urkel–type utterances (“Did I do that????) has, at times, led me to consider myself a clumsy, blundering oaf. But tonight, I would actually like to propose that it is the Steve Urkels of the world (you know who you are…) who achieve the feats worth celebrating. We clumsy, blundering oafs who pick ourselves up and go at it again will never, ever attain the status of the conquering hero. If anything, we will be remembered more for our failures than for our successes. That said, I’m finding (over and over) that it takes more determination and courage to keep trying when you’re not well suited for the task than it does for any talented and skilled superstar to do what comes easily to them.
So, if you’re thinking that the title of this post is about my accident last week, you’re mistaken. The thing I’m sorry about is wasting time repenting of trying. I’m sorry that I have felt (temporarily) like a failure again and again, when I’ve simply fallen short in a single event in the long marathon of my earthly sojourn. There are other things I am sorry about…miscues in personal relationships, goals I’ve given up on, etc., but I’ll have to work my way through those one step at a time. I hope you’ll stick with me through the process. I couldn’t make it without you.
The bike riding thing? I think I’ll give it another try after some equipment repairs and a new helmet. Oh! And a bit more physical healing! I may regret it temporarily, but I’ll take that chance.
“…one thing I do. Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”
(Philippians 3: 13b, 14 NIV)
“How long should you try? Until.”
(Jim Rohn~American entrepreneur and motivational speaker~1930-2009)